How to stay sane for the holidays and the darkest winter days
December mostly resonates with people as a desperate time to cram in as many things as possible before the end of the year. Everybody needs something—crazy, stressful Christmas shopping for last-minute gifts, when the stores are full, there’s no place to park, and everyone just seems to be going insane.
You’re just waiting for those days off, hoping not to have to wake up early for work, not see people, and just relax and regenerate.
But surely… Christmas is not that time. Family lunches and dinners are planned, you need to cook all day, and then maybe sit through some aunts or grandparents telling you how you should have your life in order by now. You’ll have to answer uncomfortable questions, and it’s all just too close to the red zone after carrying the stress of a whole year. To manage not getting nervous during the holidays? That’s pretty much a superwoman-level job to keep it all together.
So, what are some simple things you can do to avoid going crazy, not argue with your family, and even cram in some regenerative “me” time in the middle of the chaos?
Acknowledge the Stress and Let Go of Perfection
I’m well-known in my family for being a perfectionist—and for punishing myself when things don’t turn out the way I want them to. I’ll often sit there working on something until it’s “just right,” even if it drains every ounce of my energy and leaves me with zero will to live or socialize, even with my parents.
Letting go of perfection has been INSANELY hard for me to learn. My Sun sign as a Capricorn is the perfect description: stubborn, serious, ambitious, and, oh my god, wanting EVERYTHING to be done perfectly. Letting go of that has been a year-long process. My motto used to be: “If I can’t do it perfectly, I’d rather not do it at all.”
Thankfully, life has taught me otherwise. Not doing something just because you can’t do it perfectly means missing out on a lot. And constantly chasing perfection in everything stresses your nervous system to no end. It’s a never-ending rollercoaster that brings inflammation, bad moods, and overall poor quality of life—rather than fun and excitement.
The truth is, perfection is not the goal. It’s not even necessary. Sometimes it’s just about showing up, participating, having fun, and enjoying yourself. Don’t stress yourself senselessly about making everything perfect.
Your imperfections? They make you human. They make you YOU. Especially around the holidays, it’s not about getting everything to come out perfectly—it’s about connecting with family, friends, and most importantly, with yourself!
3 Tips to Let Go of Perfection During the Holidays
1. Focus on Connection, Not Perfection
Instead of trying to create a picture-perfect holiday, prioritize moments of connection with loved ones.
Ask yourself: “Will anyone really care if the dessert isn’t Instagram-worthy?”
Remember, the best memories come from shared laughter and warmth, not perfectly folded napkins.
2. Set Realistic Expectations
Perfection often comes from trying to do too much. Simplify your plans by focusing on what truly matters to you.
Make a list of priorities: What’s non-negotiable, and what can you let go of?
Delegate tasks if possible—your family or friends will likely be happy to pitch in!
3. Embrace “Good Enough”
Repeat this mantra: “Good enough is more than enough.”
Celebrate the small wins—whether it’s getting through dinner without stress or having a quiet moment to yourself.
Perfection is an illusion, but progress and presence are real.
Yes, perfection is an illusion. Let that sink in. Happy stress-free holidays! 🤎